Promise forever

I can't believe of what i done this midnight...

Sending a text message to you that says you're my friend from now onwards...

I wonder what am i thinking that time...

Maybe it sounds kinda impossible for me to say that from my mind...

Because before that i still unable to let go of it...

Many articles and different individuals also mention before...

Love someone is not to own them... 

Is to see them live with their love ones and had a happily life...

I did before... But the results... Haix... ><"

Alright... enough with the craps... 

Hope those words above does help anyone of you that surfing my blog...

Now i think bout it... 

I been wondering for so long in the misery because of you~

Well... Guess it's time to snap out of it...

So i send that message...

And it took me 10 mins coz hesitating... Haha...

I now that i cause a lot of trouble to you guys...

So i i try to fix it... 

Maybe i'm always being selfish... 

Doesn't think for other's stand... 

Since the message has been sent...

So it's gonna start all over again... 

As a friend? Yeap... Forever... 

As a friend... 

Friend... 

Hmmm... I hope she could have some confidence...

She seems very down today... Because of someone... 

A girl that knows culinary it's a normal thing... 

Though nowadays... Ahemmm... 

Just hope she'll be ok~ lol... =.="

Never saw a girl being so 'unique' like this...

Well... Guess the past it's time to be a 'past'

Shouldn't talk or think bout it anymore... 

Kinda wasted though... still young enough...

Chances will be given~ xD

Maybe for the 2nd time will makes you be more appreciate each other... 

And... Guys that loves color of pink is not a freak... =.="

I wonder why those 'machos' thought it's gay =.="

They doesn't seem to be look good on their ideal color though... haha

Well... I don't give a damn of it...

I still love it... 

kfc~ P♥nk

Again...

Well... To be frank... 

The time that i'm still in group... 

Sometimes really being left out... ignored...

Maybe you all were the most being 'concern' person in groups...

Or i'm just sucks in socialize... 

That's one of the reason i leave the group... 

Though having the best memories in my life... 

Most happiest yet the most sadness of all...

As for cow... He's not really good in social... 

You all might left out him as well... 

I don't know... He seem's to be an 'extra'... ><"

And seek help from me... haix... 

I know he's struggling in the group...

A week has passed...

It seems that pinky boy still being 'cold'...

Damn cold... T.T

What have i done? If it's about the case that day i really sorry bout that T.T

For now i don't even dare to speed with a passenger in my car... T.T

Really... I tried to speak to him... What i receive is... =.="

I don't know what else i can do... ><" 

Am i really so annoying? T,T

I have lost them... I don't want to lost all of you... T,T

Maybe i'm really an annoying person after all... 

No other places for me to confess now... T.T

Blogging... my only choice... T.T

kfc~

Anger?

Well... today having quite a lot of talk =.="

Spending my MUET lesson for that...

But i'm fine with that~ 

Sometimes speak out is not a bad thing though... 

(not me) I'm just a listener... =)

But the question that she asked me... 

Remind me of those days =.="

What she asked me is...

The time he breaking up with her... Aren't you mad at all?

Well... That time i asked myself...

What's the use for me to get mad...

It doesn't involve me at all... I'm just the outsider... 

Though she's my love ones... And he's my best friend...

Haix...

And i don't think i have rights to fight for it...

Well... I'm sick... 

kfc~ 

Silent day~

Hmm.... my phone remained silent as usual...

In addition... Having co-curricular activities...

But it's the last session? haix...

But i hope there's more co-curricular activities going on...

Well... It doesn't help me to release stress though =.="

And today it's kinda fatigue for me... ><

and guess what... Being a 'consultant' again... 

=.=" don't know that i should be glad or sad... 

so scared that i was doing the wrong thing again...

since i never success before... =.=" haix...

I'm just a 'straight forward' which i don't have any sense of humor...

For sometimes... there is... 

No idea how to make a person happy... ><"

Don't have any sense like concern to someone... Though i had it in my mind...

Yet it won't show through my actions....

Maybe it does... But most of the time... It's not...

Felt like screwed up the whole thing sometimes...

Well... have to stop being like this... 

back to sleep~ that's the only thing that can clear my mind...

=.=" but sometimes having dreams are not a good thing too... xD

kfc~ 

It has changed

After visiting your blog...

And i remind bout something too...

If you're to said that you have changed...

So as everyone...

Well... things happened so that we experienced it...

We might change as well in our thinking due to the incident happened...

If we're wish to be ourselves back... It's impossible...

Even i'll have tried... Yet the answer is... No...

Why? I was wondering around too...

Maybe we should face the fact that it's changed...

It's true that there's no more smiley face all the day...

But there's no point for us to be mourning and sad all the time...

The days still going on~

Sometimes have to think in a better way~

Maybe it's kinda fake... But if we didn't think this way...

No matter how our friends comfort us, all sorts of thing that make us cheerful just become a waste...

Just have to depend on our own...

So the pain will fade...

Someday...

Oh yea... Today's incident let me reminds of myself too...

She seems to be very concern and worried bout him...

Yet he's stubborn after all...

Maybe she just someone, but she worried to someone that do not have any relation to him?

He should be appreciated... Hope he'll...

No one will be responsible to care... But if someone that cares... Please appreciate

Haix... =)

kfc~

Playful God

Well... Sometimes the god are being playful...

Why? Is the fate wanted me to meet you back?

Lol... Never thought before that i'll saw your car...

When i would like to see you much... I wouldn't have a chance~

But as time and things happened... I choose to letting go~

But it seems that meeting such coincidently... It wasn't nice... =.="

Haix... Sucks~

kfc~

Love? Sympathy?

After a few days of consideration...

And those incident that happened and heard from my friends...

Maybe it's true that my feeling towards you already different...

Maybe it seems like i still having the same old feeling towards you...

But i realize that... After the incident happened...

It's not the feeling of love anymore...

Maybe it's what they called sympathy...

Maybe that's the reason i still wanted to stay beside you...

But it's already changed... Can't deny that...

Someone told me... 

When a love changed to sympathy... 

It's not consider as love anymore...

Feeling of sympathy... LoL...

That's the reason i being so concern =.="

kfc~

=.="

Haix...

What happened to me? 

Why I can't be myself?

I do hope everything will be going on smoothly...

Apparently... It is not...

Maybe it's true that i have to enjoy with them... 

I did tried...

But... still i can't fully enjoy it...

Well since last year... I have to idea why i have to be mourning for that situation =.="

All the time =.="

I really can't control my EQ very well...

Even while playing cards game =.="

No idea why i have to be bad temper...

haix...

After everything were came to an end...

I was speeding on the road =.="

with 3 lives on my car... 

haix... Really lucky that nothing happened...

Well... sorry for that... 

Din't think for the implication that might happen...

Learned a lesson for that...

Sometimes i do hate myself...

Hate myself for thinking so much of nonsense...

that it affect my emotion... T.T

Someone said that have to face the reality...

You can't escape from it forever...

Well... I faced the reality... But things still remain as usual...

Nothing's changed... in you? I don't know...

Things that i have said before... You might just ignore...

It seems there's no reason for me to go back into it... 

Cause no one cares about it...

Well... Return to my loneliness again... 

kfc ~

Haru Haru~

Reason that i din't post any post yesterday is because it's too tired... =.="

Coming back from badminton yesterday really strains me a lot...

Some more i'm not in a good condition... 

Felt like i'm started to get sick again =.="

But i think a good rest will recover it~ 

Saw your blog posts for yesterday and today... 

Perhaps your're still in misery...

But i hope you'll get rid of it soon... =)

Btw... i think the chocolate with almond chips that he made for you are nice ~

Well... today is chap goh mei... 15th day and also the last day of Chinese New Year...

Also known as Chinese's Valentines ~

Many people will went to riverside and throw mandarin oranges into river...

I forgot what's that for...

But i hope those who went there will found his/her another partner 1 day ~ = )

Oh yea... I bet she's happy yesterday~ 

Someone treated her drink~ o.O

I don't think i give her my blog... 

I'll give her later... 

Well... she's kinda... can't make up on her mind... 

But whatever it is... Hope she won't step too deep in it...

Cause it's hurt~ 

And i hope you will make a good decision if you consider to be with her ~ 

I don't know... Just hope you handle relationship thingy more carefully... xD

kfc~

End...

Well... Guess i just done my final task... 

Hope you like the gift i given't to you...

I have no idea why i'll be doing this~

She asked how do i have this kind of motivation?

Well... Seriously... Even myself also don't know how...

Letting go of you might seems one of the crazy thing happened to me...

But i know... Time can become the best antidote...

So hope i can make it...

Well... during this moment... I don't think i'll able to talk to you...

Need some self-control for the moment...

And very sorry that i unable to hand-in the present face to face...

Sorry...

Today's schedule...

Breakfast with maguro?

went to Giant bought something...

and then fetch my sis to IoI...

On the way... planned to pass the thing earlier... 

Your're not around... That's why i gave you just now...

and then...

Went to Atria with Brian~ 

*Bought my very first album there* =P

After that...

facebook, dinner, and workout as usual...

then starring at Blogger and homeworks after coming back =.=:

need help in maths ><" Ardra Pavi (OMG in Tamil)  !!!

Well... it's time to sleep... 

If you're looking at my blog right now...

Wanna tell you that...

Always think to the bright side~ This will makes you feel better...

Things already over... Just how much time that you need... I don't know...

Just all the best !! Hope you can make it too... 

That's all from me...

Good Night... 

kfc~ S♥ne..

Valentines Day = Single Day?

Hmm... it's Valentines... 

Well... It doesn't makes much difference to me anyway...

As usual... Went to school for class...

But i brought something...

Chocolates that i made yesterday...

Well... just because i still having the ingredients... 

Just don't want to waste it...

So decided to treat my classmates...

With improved taste of course... The previous trial was awful =.="

Too sweet....

After school... Accompany the "bucket waist" to bought something...

As a present? Quite funny though...

Then invited another 2 'kaki' which were single and spend the evening at mamak... =.=

It's sucks though... spending the special day like this... But better than nothing at all...

Well... went back for dinner and get ready for workout at gym...

And... unexpected... Saw your car parked beside me =.="

Never expect that you'll be there...

Monkey as well... and? i thought i saw the wrong person... Turkey were there too =.="

Have some talk with monkey... But as for you...

Sorry for not giving any greetings... Cause i don't know what should i say after i saw you =.="

maybe i need more time for that... 

Anyway... It almost the end of the day... Guess the day will just be like this... 

One more thing... A friend of mine... Being in loved to someone...

But she din't get any response from him... 

Well... It's almost the same way i been through before...

Just that i amazed of what she said...

Since i'll gonna letting go of you... 

I have to give the the last thing that i bought for you...

So that it's something like she said...

To let go of someone... you have to let go the whole thing...

Lol... After all... Sorry for not being a gentleman...

This is the day where my love comes to an end... 

But wish i could say one last time... 

I love you... Usagi... Saranghae

Well... Being crapping a lot here...

Still left 40 mins before the day ends...

And stop crying...

Anyway... Happy Valentines Day to everyone...

kfc~

Haix...

Well... It's Valentines day for tomorrow...

Yet I already made my decision that i have to letting go of you...

It is sad though...But I hope it is a good thing for you...

There's less one people will be nagging you day by day...

And... I hope i can make myself drunk yesterday...

Drank 3 cans and 1 bottle of beer =.=" 

still being conscious after all... 

But i know i can't drunk... I still need to drive back home from CY's house...

And beer's taste it's not good after all...

Maybe i found my Emo song because of sadness...

For every time i listen to Taeyeon's 'I love you' ...

Tears are falling like water came out from water pipes... 

I don't know why... T.T

Haix... How useless i am... ><

Letting go isn't as easy as i thought...

Well... I still can't stop thinking bout the you...

It's kinda funny... I know that thinking bout the memories will makes me sad...

Yet i'm still thinking bout it...

Why? Why? Being so fanjin !!!

Valentines... Well... Now it doesn't mean't anything for me now...

I wonder how i can settle with the presents ... =.="

Well... Maybe because of you... I learned how to make chocolate...

Too bad you didn't have a chance to try it... T.T

I don't know how i can sleep tonight... 

Just get myself drunk?

Maybe that's the way... Haha...

Guess a fool's feeling, what he does, 

or tears... 

It's not worth to be considered, thankful, or to know it...

Fool should not be kept in heart too...

I wish i were a fish...

Cause fish doesn't have a heart...

So i wouldn't hurt at all...

I wish i could be a heartless... T.T

kfc~

Nightmare... Ending...

Well... 

Today is the new year for Hokkiens ~

But... for me... 

Since last year... 

It's a pretty sad day for me though...

i have no idea why... Just... sad... T.T

Din't saw you quite some time...

immediately after the fireworks...

you talk to me...

guess you heard some stories from her or through my blog...

Hmm... A decision? and face the truth?

Maybe you're right...

I have to face it someday...

The fact that she din't have any feeling towards me...

I felt like i'm just step into the hole that 'he' stepped in before...

I'm just a coward that unable to face the truth...

Nor i can face you anymore...

We may still be friends...

I can't surpass myself...

Even though you still treat me as a friend...

I have no idea how i going to face you... just almost the same as you...

Maybe i can... But i need time for that... 

Yeap... you're right... Humans are selfish after all... 

It might be true if i left the group... No one will be affected at all...

Everything will be the same... 

Sorry that i brought so much of trouble all the time... 

After this... everything will be smooth...

Well... I think quite some time...

The following Monday...

I don't think i should give you... For no reason...

So i will not find you... or pass you the presents...

Sorry that i keep hurting you...

Sorry that i love you...

Sorry for everything i done...

Well... Think you should take care of her...

Just try not to let her be hurt anymore...

I won't be looking for you anymore...

So just take good care...

Love yourself more~

That's all i can say...

Maybe we'll meet again someday...

No one knows... 

Let the fate decide it...

The End...

Sorry... T.T

(penguin)

Still ...

Woke up at 5.30 a.m ...

Just because of the pot luck event that woke me up from the dreams...

well... it's kinda too early... so i decided to take 15 minutes more...

and during the moment... my youngest sister stayed in the bathroom =.="

so... i'll wait... then when i wanted to went in the bathroom, another 1 came and told me...

'You take a long time for shower, let me bath 1st... i'm faster' =.="

then... finally it's my turn to take a hot shower ~

after that, my 2nd alarm rings... so i turn it off...

and i saw message from meguro said that he'll be late...

well... your message was unexpected one...

After reading the message...

well... maybe it is what i'm expected to be...

and the content in the message din't surprise me at all...

guess it's the 2nd time i receiving or becoming like this...

maybe i'm really not the type that you need... 

or maybe i'm the the one who thinks that i still having any chances...

Well the truth is no... but i still place hope on it...

hope there's any single changes? 

Oh well... guess it doesn't change anything at all...

To be telling the truth, maybe i can't treat you just the way you treat me...

a year before that... we're still friends after all... but...

i can't resist nor i can control my feelings...

it's like giving me another chance to know you more, it's like a hope to me...

Friends, maybe you can proceed with the way you treat me as a friend...

but for me... i can't... 

Well... i don't think i'll be able to face you nor text you now...

the awkward situation will appear again...

Well... an apologize from you wouldn't affect my feelings towards you...

But the thing is...

you may continue treat me as a friend...

as for me... nothing will be changed at all... still it will be the same...

but what i really hope is...

be happy always... 

and i'll just stay beside and continue to be a light for you...

that's only the way i can continue to stay...

By the way... presents already bought...

well i have no idea who else i going to gift besides you...

i'll just pass the things to you on that day... 

whether you decide to keep it or not it's your choice...

Still... nothing will be changed from me...

because i can't forget... T.T

kfc~

Disappointed

Well ... Guess what?

I might made a terrible mistake again...

A week left before it is Valentines Day...

So, for those who wanted to give surprises to their another partner,

they might already started to plan...

as for those who were single... 

They will make some plan so they could find a girl/boy during Valentines...

As for me... I planned to ask her out during that day...

I prepared presents for her as well... But...

Hmm... well ... I asked her ... but i felt disappointed to myself...

After i send that message to her...

Time goes by... and theres no reply for that T.T

Well... maybe it's a mistake for me to asking you...

Maybe i'm the one who always brings bad memories to you... 

Maybe i can't give any secureness to you...

I did keep asking myself try to let you happy...

At the end... I think i'm just an igniter of everything...

I went gym for workout today...

saw your car and his car...

well... at first i wanted to meet both of you...

but i don't know what to should i say after i meet you...

so i just let fate decides... 

maybe i don't have the fate with you...

I really wanted to chat or meet you...

But... somehow... 

and there's a call from Ant just now...

I have no idea whether i'm one of you anymore...

Just that... I felt i'm the one who always chasing at the back...

I felt tired...

am i the real kfc?

Last Day ?

明天要开学了~

然而还是holiday mood ~

但不能了....

要开始拼死了...

已过了一个星期了...

还对我的决定有点后悔... =.=

对你除了早晚安以外...

今天发了一封短讯...

你没回复...

我不知道你现在怎么了...

appear offline all day long ~ ><

生活怎样? 吃的饱吗? 有失眠吗? 

都担心你的状况...

如果当时我真的过火了...

我只能对你说声对不起... 

这也是有史以来以这个态度对你... 

如果我错了... 对不起...

因为真的不忍心看到你再因为回忆而哭泣 ... T.T

对不起... ><" 失去理智的我... 也许根本帮不了什么... 

对不起

现在想对你说...

난 벌써 당신이 그리워요

당신을 사랑합니다

有机会吗? 

><

kfc~

新年

回想起来... 去年的大年初一是情人节...

如果不是我得回乡下...

也许礼物已在你的手中...

但这也是不可能的...

因为对象并不是我...

昨天发出去的祝贺讯息...

也没有想到你会回我...

虽然说好我不会再打扰你...

但一声祝贺应该没问题吧...

我不知道我在你的心目中是什么...

可能我只是自欺欺人罢了...

一直想着一些异想天开的事...

因为我知道，

他在你的心目中... 成了一个不能代替的地位...

我知道...

怎么劝也对你是没用的...

离情人节还有11天...

应该送你礼物吗？

还是我所做的一切都不应该？

kfc~

Day at Genting

Rain started to drop since yesterday ...

for the whole day, the rain non stops... =="

and i wonder, 

if i'm going to Genting for trip and meet with rainy days...

that day sure sucks ~ 

well... we reached Genting...

small rain drops and heavy mist with heavy wind chill my cheeks !!!

it's much more colder than i expected...

due to green house effect...

Genting highlands' temperature become lower? Thats OMG !!!

Well... we manage to spend our 1st day in the indoor... =.="

Hope today's outdoor will be going smoothly~

And i kinda hate myself... unable to bear and hold against my words...

><" said that no more text to her... but i can't resist !!

haix ... but she din't reply... expected outcome from me...

just that giving myself a little tiny hope to that ~ T.T

maybe it's not a bad thing... maybe i could let it go ~?